Meet Charlie McCarthy

So in the most recent feat in Israel’s quest to become the strangest kid I’ve ever met, he recently earned enough money to purchase a ventriloquist dummy.

He had been doing internet research for a few months. The cheapest ones he could find were $69.95 plus shipping, but eventually he found a used one that was in almost new condition on ebay. He eventually won it, a Charlie McCarthy circa 1995 for $43.00 with free shipping. After we paid for it he began setting his alarm early every morning to see if the package had arrived-- even though I repeatedly told him we’ve never before received deliveries before 7:00am-- and driving me crazy after school asking why it hadn’t arrived while he was at school. The shipping notification said 4-7 days, and of course it didn’t arrive til day 7.

But yesterday Charlie finally arrived and Israel has been developing his routine ever since. (So beware. You will probably be subjected to it shortly.) He is very impressed with his deal and what good shape the thing is in for being such an antique. I couldn’t figure out why he kept saying ol’ Charlie was so old. I had just thought it was a couple years old, but I guess when you were born in 1997, 1995 does seem like ancient times.

Israel was still one dollar short of the amount he needed to buy the doll when he was sure it would arrive. (I told him he would not take possession until he had paid in full.) But then he suspiciously got one from Azia. I asked why she had given it to him and he said he’d sold her an hour lesson on Karate or Kung Fu or any number of other things he in reality knows nothing about. So, I told Azia in addition to her lesson, she had also just purchased an hour of time to experiment with Charlie anytime after Israel had him for a full day.

So this evening she was very excited to cash in her hour. Charlie talked a bit (Azia’a a bit shy about trying it out), then hung out and had a tea party with a load of Care Bears, before Azia created a romantic dinner for him and one of her cabbage patch kids.

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