I finally filed my taxes at about 2:00 in the morning. And of course this was my audit risk level, as it is every year.
As far as I can tell, this is a result of claiming a whole lot of children, owning a business, and not making any money. Apparently this year I made an even smaller amount of money compared to the small amount I made last year. Since the children are really mine (not some borrowed social security numbers) my business really doesn't make much money (since it revolves around children and doing contract work in educational settings) and I don't see any dramatic increases in my income in the near future, I assume it's only a matter of time before I get audited.
I'm hoping maybe the obvious fact that it's going to cost the IRS more to pay someone to audit me than I actually make in a year can save me.